there’s a quote from a sappy chick flick i love –
“he and i spent a day on the river. he fished and i read; it was one of those perfect days. we were on our way home and he said he had something to tell me. i said, ‘is it going to make me happier or less happy?’ he said, ‘less happy.’ i said… ‘then don’t tell me.’”
it’s not the greatest thing in the movie, and it’s a pretty sad part. but i loved the question.
is it going to make me happier or less happy?
i want to ask myself this about everything this year. do what i know will make me happy. i come up with so many excuses to not go to the gym. or to yoga. or off the couch. but it does not make me happy.
will it make me happier or less happy…
to sit on the couch?
to ignore the dishes?
to leave my great camera in my bag because i’m too lazy or self-conscious?
to tell myself i’m too tired to go to the gym?
to let the cold keep me from visiting a friend after work?
to binge on junk food while remembering how horrible it makes me feel after and how, once i start, it’s never enough?
to not plan meals or follow weight watchers because i feel hopeless, even though i know i’ve taken care of myself like that before?
to feel hopeless about anything, in the middle of such an amazing, great time in my life?
i guess this could all wrap up into one of my resolutions for the year — working on being mindful. if i know something i’m about to do [or usually, not do] is going to make me less happy, why do i keep doing it?
i can’t tell if this post sounds negative, but i really mean it to sound exactly the opposite. i feel so excited for the fresh start of 2013, to really make decisions that will make me happier. there’s no reason i have to be passive about anything like this, and i think all these so-small things will add up to a great, fun new year.